Wednesday, June 20, 2012

g.l.o.r.i.a.

 this is my headpiece that i made for the mermaid parade on saturday!



i was reading in the park today and a man came up to me and tried to talk to me and wouldn't leave me alone. he was trying to talk to me about things that one should never try to talk to a stranger about and i, being the scared rabbit that i am, had no idea how to handle the situation and entertained his questions as long as i could and made up an excuse to leave and ran
my style is a constant struggle between being able to express myself and avoiding the kind of attention i don't want. yes i'm wearing shorts. i'm not wearing shorts as an invitation to try to touch my arse.
i know i get attention from the way i dress. 
it's not what i aim for. i'm sure a lot of people think it is, but it's not. i dress the way i feel comfortable dressing. i don't know why people take my hair or my clothes as an invitation to say horrible sexual things that i just don't want to hear. it makes me want to never leave my apartment again and i hate that because i've had to deal with so much anxiety and so much shit and i'm finally feeling like myself again and then someone decides to treat me like this and once again i'm nothing but my appearance.
and how is that fair?

xoxo 
mouse

8 comments:

Meghan Edge said...

SO Jelly that you're going to the mermaid parade!!!!!!!

edie pop said...

I've been through that too, especially at your same age when I lived in Rome, it's a great struggle with yourself..I love to express my personality, but people just doesn't get it and I've been judged for eras and harassed by every maniac around and most of the time I felt guilty to wear shorts or glitzy clothes and it's not fair..I think that we are unique beings and the fact that we are "judged by our covers" makes us at first weak but then we become stronger or at least we give a try as we call ourselves into question..you are tall and beautiful and you can't help ,but you'll always rise amongst all, so live your life as you want!
Your headband is mermaidlicious!
xxxx

Laura Morrigan said...

I;ve been thru stuff like that. i went thru this whole stage where i got hit on so often by skeezy guys that live around my area that i started wearing shapeless clothing. but around my area, people often go out in trackpants and ugh boots and pyjamas, so it is easy to see that i stood out. I don't think there is anything wrong with the way you dress! It shits me big time how many men assume we dress for their benefit, instead of just to express ourselves.

having said that, weirdos do tend to hang around parks. mad people and druggies used to hang around the park in the middle of the city when we were kids, and it got so bad our family just started avoiding it completely. weird people would just com eup to you and say shit. so it's probably not completely about what you were wearing.

and of course, unfortunately as attractive young women sometimes we are more likely to get chatted to by strange people just cause of being cute. i don't mean that in a stuck up way, but it's true. would someone rather go up to a middle aged alco woman or a cute teenage/ not that far past teenage girl.

stay strong in who you are. keep expressing yourself. don't let fear rule your life and change who you are or you let them win! If i could, i would change that moment when i started noticing what i wore and worrying about men perving on me. i would realise that i don't need to worry about this shit, and i just have to be me. Be safe, of course, avoid weirdos. but be yourself. cause from the small amount i know about you, you seem pretty awesome.

sorry about the mini-essay. :P

Laura Morrigan said...

oh and btw not in all situations but sometimes if helps to mention a boyfriend. like when this guy was hitting on me once and kept asking me to go to coffee with him even tho i kept saying no, i told him i had a boyfreind who is studying to be a lawyer, and he went off pretty quick to harass someone else. it's actually true, but whatever. i know i shouldn't advise lying, but it can help. also if you are ever really scared, pretending that someone is like your dad or something (assuming there is someone in the park) can help, but i don't know if that one works, cause i've never tried it.

Magnet said...

It's not fair at all, there are a lot of weird jerks out there and it fucking sucks. I also hate the fact that some of my favourite outfits attract a lot of attention and then I don't feel comfortable wearing them and as soon as you don't feel comfortable or confident, you feel like an idiot. It definitely attacks your self esteem. The whole thing is just shit. I love your shirt btw.

Shybiker said...

I'm sorry, hon. It sucks that there are men out there who behave so badly. You don't deserve that.

I'm going to the Mermaid Parade, too. If you see me there, say hello. I'll be wearing bright blue Vans and matching shorts.

Charlie Wilkins said...

I can relate...

Charlie Wilkins said...

Also, "arse"? You've been hanging round with me for too long.

x

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